Green
Sunlight streamed through the gaps between the crinkled branches. The hills overflowed with green grass swaying with serenity. A small girl with tear-stained cheeks sprawled on her back in the quiet shade the dying willow provided with its dark emerald leaves.
April laid there more often then not. The soft grass perfectly cushioned her tired back and left tiny smears on her flowy shirt. In the shade of the dilapidated tree, she was more than safe. She was alone.
From all those times when there was no way to spill out all the wrongness, she could escape. From the times she opened her mouth wide and screamed silently so that no one would scare, she could be gone. From every difference, worry, frustration in her life, she could break free.
The tree and the hills and the grass couldn’t heal her issues. Even if they could, April herself would not be healed. But for then, it was enough for her to lay and feel the green.
UVM Mentor Feedback
Georgia,
I really enjoy this little story you’re working on. I am incredibly impressed by the imagery you use, even more so when I realized you are only in eighth grade! It seems this time of year the prompt ‘green’ brings to mind the brightening of the landscape that surrounds us, from trees to the hills to the grass. You manage to use the idea of ‘greenery’ without going over the top. I enjoy that the word itself appears in your first line but then not again until the last.
My biggest piece of advice for this piece is to keep going! I think it would lend itself really well to either a poem or to continue on in its current state as a short story. I want to know about April’s issues and what will happen next. She can’t lie there forever, can she?
Keep writing, and thanks so much for submitting!
Natalia
UVM Mentor
UVM Mentor
AHMAZING!!!!!
GEOWGIA--
this is an absolutely amazing piece!!!!!! did it end up getting submitted? i never found out...
I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!
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harriet waited so rosa could sit.
rosa sat so martin could walk.
martin walked so obama could run.
obama ran so we can FLY
LOVE
SAWAHHH!!! i submitted it but they did not select it :_( oh well maybe next time! I miss you sooo much!!! xoxooxoxoxxxooxoxoxo call me!