Luna

Hi Katherine,
I really liked this poem! My family spends every summer on Cape Cod, and when my cousin Michelena was little, the only words she could say for a long time were "da boats!" and "da moon!" I think I liked your poem so much because it made me think of her; it's so interesting what little ones' first words are, and it's neat that your little brother and my little cousin have that first word in common!
I also thought that your poem was really well written. It flowed really well, and I feel like it was the perfect length. Really the only editing suggestions I would make are a couple of little grammar mistakes: "brothers" should be "brother's" because it was his first word and therefore belongs to him, and you forgot to capitalize "Spanish" in the sixth line. Other than that I thought it was pretty flawless.
One thing you might think about doing is writing a series of poems kind of like this about your baby brother; I think that would be really cool. Of course, you don't want to over do it, but I think talking about his first word or his first steps or other important firsts would be a really cool combination of works. I'd try another one and see how you like it. It could end up being a really nice gift for him or for your parents.
Best,
Tressie
UVM Mentor