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Wrong Thing

Anonymous's picture
Submitted by Anonymous on May 11, 2008 - 20:53.

I'm not sure the slur was
really all that I meant it to be,
dripping thickly,
sticky sweet
into your ear,
laughing with the moonlight and the
crowd of people standing below the
balcony.
Being pushed over it wasn't
half bad
and I half hoped
the colour of my hair
the taste of my lips
the easy little flits of my
lazy lashes
would remain in your dreams
forever.
I guess in a few ways they did
but then again
I'm usually wrong.

qwertygirl890123's picture

Very Vivid

Submitted by qwertygirl890123 on May 11, 2008 - 21:05.

You describe everything so well (and in most cases I don't like heavy descriptions) and I actually like it a lot. I really like the way you spaced it out, and the language you used.

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