One Sentence *Seven through Twelve*
A continuation from my last blog post. I'm thinking about doing 100. Over a period of time of course... otherwise I believe I may get frustrated.
7: As I ran by her, to the boy to her right, I wondered what her lips would have tasted like last spring had they not been covered with tears of sadness.
8: I bite him because I'm afraid if I don't leave a mark, he'll forget about me the moment he leaves the room.
9: My father once told me I was a bitch; I told him he was a bastard and I didn't give a shit anymore.
10: Every time I drive over a bridge, I can't stop laughing, because I'm always thinking, "Hey, wouldn't it be easy to just drive off the edge?"
11: When he died, the only thing I could think outside of the numbness in my hands was "Would they cry for me?"
12: At one point, I had convince myself it wasn't ME who was making me bleed, it was the other girl that would take over my body on lonely, selfish nights.
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seven through twelve
Nice. These are all pretty painful...particularly number twelve (which is quite powerful by the way). Ten evokes a character and their past. I like eight and nine: they tell the story with few words and without trying too hard. Those are stories in themselves and would only lose some of the impact if they were longer. I had to read eleven a few times over before I got it: the story contained in that one is a little harder to access but all the more complete for the difficulty in getting there. I'm afraid I was a little confused by seven. Maybe reword the first two phrases?
I didn't mean for this comment to be a sentence-by-sentence reaction. That's just kind of the way my brain is working right now.
Good! I'm glad they got you
Good! I'm glad they got you thinking that way! Id love to see some responses that people make to a one sentence prompt. Seven was hard to write. I wasnt really sure how to put it... maybe it would be better as
7: Running past her in the stairwell towards the boy, I remembered the way her lips used to taste, before they were soaked with tears of pain and a conscious hate for men.
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"Characters are only the pawns of Reality, and reality must begin somewhere." ~Self Quoted
Yes
Rewritten is better. The story is more clear now. Careful--the random reader may be confused about the gender/sexuality of the speaker...just a thought...
gender bender!
but does the gender really matter?
and either way, doesnt the sexuality remain bisexual?
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"Characters are only the pawns of Reality, and reality must begin somewhere." ~Self Quoted
True
So this one-sentence story is even less typical...I say stick to the revised version of number seven. It's a little clearer.
i like this idea
it helps get your mind flowing and they all have such potentials for great stories, i loved number 7 but the new way would make it way easier to understand, 8 gives a good character, and 12 is definitely very powerful :)
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to stop, its about learning how to walk in the rain
I love them all. They
I love them all. They recall my anguish and I want to give you a hug. I also appreciate the bisexual reference. I'm a lesbian and I always find it really comforting to read anything with a varrying orientation.
I'm glad you feel
I'm glad you feel comfortable talking about stuff like this... I think half the reason I put this stuff up is because I see alot of things that are the same... not really. but you know what I mean. I like breaching new horizons... and scaring teh CRAP outta myself.
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"Characters are only the pawns of Reality, and reality must begin somewhere." ~Self Quoted
You want
You want to post something different?
Awsmpossum: I applaud your courage. Thanks for trusting us here with that.
Thanks for making yourselves
Thanks for making yourselves trustworthy :)
wow
Possum I admire you for not be timid about that. An open world leads to a brighter future...*smilez*
Peace,
Mango
P.S. are you coming to the YWP conference?
Thanks Mango! It's a part of
Thanks Mango!
It's a part of me that I love and I don't believe in hiding it. :)
-Possum
P.S. I really want to!