lies

Dazed and dreaming
Float away
Watch the world
With an empty face
They call you beautiful
They call you smart
They say "your future's bright"
And that you have a big heart

So why does it feel
Like you're on your own
Even when you laugh
It's like you're all alone
They laugh along with you
They talk and they share
But still sometimes
It's like they aren't really there

Not on the same page
Not even the same book
They've got the right one
And you don't know where to look
Because everything you say
Just comes out wrong
And now you're wondering how long
You can play along

Before they can see through you
To call your bluffs
Before they realize what's happened
And say that they've had enough
How long will it take
til they figure it out?
How long will you last
Once they've figured you out?

Not long, probably...
You that's its true
And when all's said and done
They can laugh at you
On your own
Because
You already know
How to survive alone

You irritate me

You
With your promises
With your "maturity"

With your lies

You irritate me

You
Pretending to try
Pretending to be responsible

Pretending to be truthful

You irritate me

You
When are you going to stop?
When are you going to grow up?

When are you going to become dignified?

You irritate me

Stop being stupid

Nobody understands how I feel,
they think they feel what I feel,
but what I feel is real.
What they feel is fake,
they think that they can make,
something they can take,
and make it real,
but what I feel is real.
They thought that what they took,
would be a hook,
to make me feel what isn't real,
but what I feel is real.

Alone I sit,
with the cold darkness all around me.
You told me I was your only,
but now I know other wise.
From a box of pictures,
hidden under old fur coats.
Of you and her,
at our spot.
On the rivers edge.
Kissing and smiling.
Of you and her,
at the fair,
laughing and pushing.
Of you and her in this house,
that we had made our own.
...You lied to me

It always irritates me when music varies depending on which ear you use. If it's the left ear, you might only get the drums and bass - the right ear might be vocals and guitar. There are various combinations in which this can take place but all of them are frustrating. Recently, I was over at a friend's house. I had my iPod with me and we were exhausted and bored. I managed to extract it from my pocket and plugged in the ear buds. I gave her the right ear, leaving myself the left. I went to one of my favorite songs - my friend hadn't heard it yet. I knew basically every note by heart while she knew nothing. It was surprising when the intro didn't play. I turned to my iPod to make sure it was going and sure enough, the faint echo of drums reached my ear. Sighing, I put down the iPod and collapsed contently on the floor. I could deal with hearing only part of this. Then, the realization hit me - my friend didn't know this song.

He says you're differant.
Why do you belive him?
His friends say he likes you,
that he might even love you.
Are they all in on it?
He asks you to hang
but he never shows.
You thought it could work.
You know hes a player.
So why do you bother?
He says he's changed.
So much for that.

I say
I Love You

When you
Leave

When I
Leave

On the
Phone

In the
Mail

I say
I Love You

And I
Don't think
I mean it

woman
you best know that this
is shit

if you believe this
you're lying in a huge
puddle of lies

you are pretty
you are wanted
you are loved
you are desired
you are envied
you are stunning

you're just you
and that's all you'll ever be
and that's a good thing
don't be someone else

i don't want to be friends
with anyone but you

stop waiting for rejection
from boys
from teachers
from friends
from everyone

you'll be waiting for
the rest of your life

alone
scared
miserable
self loathing

if that's who you want to be
leave me out

cause i'm just me
and that's all i'll ever be
and the me that i am
knows that her best friend
is not who she thinks she is

so stop wallowing in self pity
get up off your ass
and be phenomenal

oh
wait

you already are

Mask of Lies
By: Derrick Spalding

A mask hides the true person
Like the dark blanket of deception.
As the man gets tangled in his web of lies,
He realizes the only way out,
Is to take the mask off.
As easy as it sounds,
The blanket is too heavy to lift,
And suffocates him until he is no more.
Days later an unmasked child lifts the blanket,
Finding the crippled remains,
Of a mask just his size.

I'll never forget the day
That he visited me
Everyone said that he was crazy
That everything he said
Was nothing but crazy-talk
And that's what I thought too
Until I actually listened
To what he had to say

"Truth is like a blanket
That is just too small.
You can try and try
To cover yourself completely
But it'll never work
You'll only be able
To cover your face,

Everyone always
Criticize others
When a truth
Of their personality
Is brought to light
Yet they themselves
Are desperately
Trying to hide
Something about
Themselves as well
So why is it
That they make fun
Of others who have
Been exposed
When they themselves
Are hiding behind
Their mask of lies

The ice sticks out
Bare-faced in front of me
Telling me
That I’m going to fall
For sure

The snow buries the ice
Underneath the lies
Of comfort and easiness
Lingering fear but no certainty
Of whether I’ll fall
Or not

You leave me hanging
With uncertainty
I know it's wrong
But the snow
Just feels too good
Right now

It starts out as one,
a small one that doesn’t really matter.
Until I keep doing it
and soon that’s all I want to do.
I lie to myself, I lie to everyone else.
Does this make me feel good?
I feel guilty, there’s doubt in my mind.
Should I be honest, or should I keep going with it?
Should I keep telling lies to cover up the first one?
It could work…right?

Dear Me,
That is one ugly top.
The colors make me sick
That shade of yellow makes you
look Jaundiced
Those polka dots are bloated
The seams are ripped on the sleeve
The top must have shrunk in the wash
And
That silhouette is so last year.

For all of love that is good:
NEVER wear that thing AGAIN.

But for now I'll just say you look
Chic
Fabulous
and Cute

I’m just a child
That doesn’t know better
Than to hide
From the truth.

Livin’ my life in
A world that don’t matter
At all
To you.

Surrounded by liars
And hateful suspicion
I just don’t know
What to do.

Today was a day
I kept on wishing
I would never meet your eyes.

The ones
That are a sea green.
The ones
That hold a history
We never wish to remember.

And today was a day
I kept on wishing
You could see my eyes.

The ones
That are darkest brown.
The ones
That use to smile like you do now.

Your eyes,
My eyes.
They both use to see
What we thought we believed.

Flames flair within, burning a hole
In my heart, curling around me
Can't you see that I'm lost in that
One moment

One moment of peace
One moment of real love
Please don't just shove
Me out of the way
Listen to my heart,
It's got lots to say
It's singing so loudly,
I can't hear myself think
I'm sinking...
Sinking

I can no longer breathe
I'm gasping for air