hurt

She lies on the floor half dead
Half alive
Numb and torn inside

She's tried to many times
To get them to understand
She can't do it anymore.

She thinks about death
How she's going to die
How she's going to commit suicide

Then as she slits her wrists,
Tears fall down the sad girl's face
As she wishes to go to a better place.

Where would I be without You?
What would life be like,
if it were missing You?
If I was without the on that
Hurt
Me the most?
Where would I be without
Abandonment?
Pain?
Would life be easier
if I could go Everyday
without feeling Traded?
Where would I be without the
Man
That I see four times a year?
I wouldn't be.
If it weren't for that Man.
If it weren't for my Dad.

Today I remembered
why I loved you before
But I also remembered
why I hated you so much
but it's hard to let go
because I remember
what you were like
I remember
how u called me beautiful
I remember
how your touch felt
I remember
Your smell and how it made me weak
I remember
you were all I dreamed about
But I also remember how you walked away
How you became
what I wished you weren’t
How you hurt me so badly
Yet I still look past it because
When I see you smile
I remember
That you made me smile like never before
And when I hear you laugh
I remember
That when I was with you that was all I did
But I wish just one time
I could watch you cry
So I could remember
that I cried all night long
And it was all because of you
But yet I still forget

Oh here They go again
I sometimes feel bad for her
her Friends treat her like crap
There's never anyone that loves her enough to defend her
Poor Lost Girl.
She doesn't have a clue
In Their little Clique
she just blends
When she really
Has No Friends
Everyone will feel guilty
when by choice
Her Life Ends

A little harsh word at the end, cave!

He's getting surgery
Again

His stupid job
Has hurt him
Too many times
In too many ways

He flexes his
Right hand
His muscles rippling
With little effort

This might be
The last time
He can do that

It's his shoulder
A worker's comp thing
Putting him
In physical pain

That's nothing
Compared
To not being able

To play catch
To manhandle a four-wheeler
To run a chainsaw
To stir dinner
To start a lawn mower
To shoot a gun
To chop wood

To hug his daughter tight

All the things
That make him
Who he is

I can remember him
Wincing in pain
As he put on his sling
Every morning

Dutifully squeezing
His physical therapy ball
To bring his muscles
Back into function

His right arm
Which once did reps
With my 10-year old body
May no longer work

What the fuck?

All I wanted was for it to work.
But, of course, it wasn’t up to me.
It was barely anything at all.
Maybe it was just your imagination.
It was only in my head.
That’s where it wanted to be.
It just wanted to mess with me.
All it wanted was me to hurt.
What I wanted was for it to go away.

Confused,
These words,
I don't know..
These words,
The ones said.
What?
Explain,
They don't
Make sense.
I wish,
Only wish,
To have it,
Like you.
My heart
Is being played,
Played like a game.
Fair?
Hell no.
Can I stop?
I have,
It's up to you.
You are
The only one,
Only one
That can
Fix this,
This hurt.
This hurt,
Caused by you!!
These words,
Made this hole,
Hole in my heart.
Full of
What used to be,
Love.

"I don't love you
And I don't want you."
You have no idea
How those words
Affected me
At first they didn't
Make any sense
Nothing did
But eventually
It all sunk in
And my will to
Have a life
Of any sort
Disappeared completely
But I eventually decided
That I wouldn't
Move foreward
So that there
Wouldn't be a past
Filled with hurt
But you eventually
Came back and
Apologized
And I forgave you
And managed to
Move on with my life

I know I'm beyond your forgiveness,
I know that I've scarred you.
But, please, at least hear me out,
Listen to what I know is true.

You don't really understand,
I do love you, more than anything.
You're the first to treat me like a person,
And, in return, I destroyed your everything.

I've hurt you more than I'll ever know,
Strangled your heart and broke it, too.
Ripped the wings off the back of my angel,
Shattered the very essence that is you.

But you can't leave me, I need you!
Without you, I'll go even more insane!
You're the one person that I've ever loved,
That can pierce the madness of my brain.

You are the light to my darkness,
The beautiful angel of my life.
Being with you can bring me some peace,
Put at bay all of the pain and strife.

I can never express how sorry I am,
I wish I could take everthing back.
I want to redeem myself in your eyes,
Show you that my soul is not completely black.

I promise you, I swear to you
I'm going to make things right.
I swear that I want to make you happy,
And end, love, your eternal night.

Why can’t you see that it hurts?
When you yell at me
And never come home?
Why can’t you realize that I cringe
Every time I see you?
I shouldn’t feel this way,
But I always do.
Sometimes I wish you would leave.
I love her so much
And it makes me hate you that much more.
When she has to decide between defending me
Or having you yell at her too.
You make me doubt myself and cry.

I'll tell you what I remember....

Well. I was wandering through this abandoned police station with a blond haired boy [I think his name was Daniel?] and a different light haired girl. We were just lounging around, going to mess up some stuff, when I suddenly felt this chilling wind/vibe through my spine.

I turned and saw it was the basement...which mind you was quite eerie.

the different kinds of love
i observe him feeling
he follows that girl
and all along my heart is realing
she does not feel that way
but i'll lose his friendship
if i were to try to say
"you desurve more,
dont let your self be treated this way"
and he would respond
"thats what i love her for"
he cant let go of her pain
and i cant let go of his
our relationship i cant end

Flames flair within, burning a hole
In my heart, curling around me
Can't you see that I'm lost in that
One moment

One moment of peace
One moment of real love
Please don't just shove
Me out of the way
Listen to my heart,
It's got lots to say
It's singing so loudly,
I can't hear myself think
I'm sinking...
Sinking

I can no longer breathe
I'm gasping for air