Religion

Some people call good things miracles
Like a truck swerving out of the way at the last minute
I call that a close call
Calling things we see as wonderful
An act of “god”…
Things like that?
Like a truck almost killing someone?
Almost?
No wonder there’s a religion about “him”
We focus only on the good “he” does
We ignore the fact that we were put into the situation in the first place
Something that could be easily blamed on “god”
Something,
That over the years,
People have been trained not to do
I say there are no miracles
No acts of “god”
Only close calls

Listening to: Reel Big Fish - Everything Sucks
(in my head..."doo-doo-do-do-do-d-doo-doo"...yeahhh...)

I was just thinking...
It is fairly well accepted that Scientologists are crazy right? They believe that little aliens are in our brains trying to make us do bad things...or some shit like that...
That sounds TOTALLY insane.
But...
The idea of "God" is not nearly as ridiculed. Sure, there are people that think it's ridiculous, but you can't just sit down at a table full of people you don't know and go
"So, how bout those Christians, eh? Thinkin' there's god. What nuts!"
But, you can do that with scientology...(I have.)

But...think about it.

Little invisible creatures in our heads telling us what to do = Scientology, right? (More or less...)

One huge badass intangible consciousness floating around telling people what to do = Christianity. (Again, more or less. Jesus wasn't THAT important anyway...)

God sits atop his throne, looking down at his subjected multitudes. He grins to himself, relishing the pure extent of his power.
He tries to get up, but realizes that thick chains bind him to his throne. A cry of devastation echoes across your brain as God realizes that he, along with his subjects, can only exist there.

(I was wondering what a cocktail party at God's house would be like, from the point of view of an atheist here.

This is just the beginning, but I'm not going to be able to use the internet for a while and, while I intend to enlarge this and podcast the entirety of it, I wanted to tease any potential readers.

And, just in case you were wondering, yes, I am an awful, awful person.

If you are easily offended, please, turn, run, and do not look back.

-Geist)

“So the guy kisses me on the cheek, I turn to him before the centurions grab me, and I say, ‘So you really are bi, aren’t you, Judas?”

“Ha oh ho, oh, son. You always were better at humor than me.”

“Really, dad? I thought the whole ‘being eternally born into poverty’ thing was pretty amusing, in a sick sort of way.”

“No, no, that was all the Upanishads. Anyway, I like your subtlety, and the back-story to every joke you have goes so deep.”

The world was created in six days,
Noah built an arch for his family,
The center of the universe is the Trinity.

To these things I do not pray,
I see the big bang and evolution,
In science I see a revolution.

An atheist is someone with whom they do not play,
Ideas are different with all of us,
But in mine they do not trust.

In godlessness they see worldly decay,