brother

I was trying to get to point B
when let my hand drop to my side,
and two rings fell off
my thinning fingers.
The sound of metal hitting wood
sent me scurrying across the floor
to find them;
my face was inches away from the ground,
and my stomach was scooting me along
as I skimmed my palms, searching.

I was desperate,
collecting dust on my clothing,
and writhing on the ground.
And by the time I found the
rings under my sock basket,
I could conclude a few things:
First, that if my hip bones
make a thud when I lie on the ground,
and rings are falling off
my fingers, I should start eating more.
Second, if I am able to wiggle
on the floor after I find
what I am looking for,
I should start trying to find
my brain as well.
And lastly, I need to vacuum.

Going on 7 years
You are still my entire life
You are something to
Cry about
Think about
Talk about
Why You left
No surprise
For a horrible year and a half
my 9 year old self knew
We all knew
But pretended to hope
and how would that help?
When the prayers
Thoughts
surgery
Radiation
And chemo didn’t
I was only nine, my sister 7, my brother 5
But you left

I admire my twenty – three year old brother Nate because he is in college and he is majoring in philosophy. Some day I would like to be in college and graduate also. He is a really good skier. It’s really cool snowboarding with him. He is so fast it’s hard to keep up.

My Brother

Disbelieving.
Golden lion doesn’t yet know
What is to become of him.

Brother sits across.
Weary and dull.

Sirens faintly heard through their ears.
But lion doesn’t comprehend.
Nor does golden lion run.

But they’re here.
And golden lion’s cries
Cannot be helped.

And then on.

These two once like brothers,
Together again.

Pacing golden lion.
Caged.