i

All she wanted was to
weave her skin with his,
to tie their hair in
pretty bows and
suffocate in love as if
it were a
poison laced
with so much
beauty.

All she wanted was to
rip out his heart,
dripping with warmth and
sticky energy, and
squeeze it into the
cavity beneath her
ribs, next to her own,
where they would
beat and
live
together.

All she wanted was
to bottle that
love-struck emotion forever,
the one that she
sometimes saw dancing
between the veins
in his eyes; she
wanted to
trap it so
that when he
eventually left her,

she could
still remember
how to
breathe.

It was interesting
how quickly
they stopped telling their
friends
about my
blog

when the poetry
about my life
started to appear.

The truth was
something unheard of.

And when I told them I'd
stopped writing,
I could see the relief
that they tried to
mask, as it
flooded their
voices and
their eyes stopped
looking so
frightened.

Maybe they think
that if I stop writing about
problems,

they'll just
go
away.

Maybe being anonymous
is easier for
both of us.

Do you remember
that night you worshiped
me?
Your hands gripped tight against
my flesh, not wanting
to ever be
pried off, you
whispered like the softness of
rose petals
into my ear-

I'm so afraid of
losing you.

That desperate,
choked with longing
kind of love
made me
want to lose myself in
your body, let your blood
become my breath,
your skin my flesh,
everything connected until
you were
me,
I was
you,
we were Us and

beauty was
no longer
an illusion.

She told me with
slippery-happy words
that I should
write something about
her.
Speech slurred.
Grinning just
a bit
too
much.

I just smiled,
knowing that

she could never understand
what that smile
really
meant.

(It means that
I already do.)

Walking along the highway
to school,
6 AM with
the sun pouring over mountains
like an open wound,
it's blood-light
soaking deep into my
pores, I saw
everything
as art.

6 AM and there were
tiny stalks of grass,
poking their faces up
through cracks in the pavement,
little orbs of dew
sparling on their tops,
capturing rainbow worlds as they
laughed, and

whenever the cars
pushed wind
over their
fat, emerald bodies,
they danced, and
I

imagined

what their tears
would look
like,

flicking off
into oblivion.