memories

I was once that kid with the ice cream stained face. The kid who didn't have a care in the world. The kid who didn't care what people thought of her, only cared about the friends she was with and what they thought. The kid who loved water and sang, even if she wasn't a very good singer. The kid who would "chill" with the family, share stories, and roast marshmallows until they were black then realize she didn't like them that way! I was the child who went to church with my grandpa and sat down front when other people didn't care to come along and join. And now they regret it even more because he's gone and they don't have a chance to do it again.

The leaves rustle as I step on the wooden bridge leading to a covered forest. A bird swoops down to reach a berry making the simplest sound but creating a rustle in the bush. Vermont surrounds itself around a cloud of green leaves and a touch of tradition. Though it is seen sometimes at its worst during certain months, it draws visitors from around the world, from its warm colors in the autumn to the white powdery mountains. The state’s natural beauty and traditional surroundings captivate all.
My passion for history allows me to imagine the environment of Vermont as if it was back in time. The wooden bridges and old houses recreate a time long ago as the deep forests surround them. When the colonies in America were forming, life was much simpler and centered around the land. Bringing my mind back to that period in the 1700s makes me feel at peace with the autumn season and forests that supported colonists.

Winter Carnival
A biting wind silently roars
A subtle knife tearing through me
Like cutting open a bursting net of dead fish
It spills into the now skeletal Carnival stalls
Aging them, to wash away the bawdy memories
while the empty colors fade
into a deeper haze of gray.

An arbitrating judge,
The Ferris wheel stands
High above the tumultuous hoards
Of confused and desperate emotion.
It deflects the sun’s pleading rays
Letting them fall rejected and useless
In the crisp sterile air.

You always said that life was a like a Ferris wheel
And I thought you meant it had its ups and downs
A roulette of good luck and bad
I thought you knew
You would always rise again
Under a golden crown of sunshine.
I thought that even in your sea of self
Pity, misery and shame,
You would still remember the smiles
Of crimson poppies, and eager crocuses,
The slobbery kisses of concord grape
A scent I thought impossible to forget

I struggled to get into my coat with my mittens on. Dad waited for me patiently. He was going out to walk the ski paths at the ski tow. As Daddy’s little girl, it was my duty to follow him everywhere. I finally got into my jacket and promptly realized that I had another problem. I walked over to Dad and demanded he zip my jacket. He dutifully took off his own gloves to zip me up. I was finally ready.

I Hope for More

I remember… we made snow huts,
and drank hot chocolate when we came in.
We made cupcakes everyday I came over,
and gave them to Cody for his “birthday”.
We played cards and watched movies.
It was you who taught me go fish.
We rode on the snowmobile and
jumped on the trampoline.
We went for walks and bike rides
and made snow angles in the snow.
I just wanted to let you know, I love you so.

Out of all the things we did before,
all the fun, and all the laughs.
We haven’t stopped yet, and I hope for more.

~Michaela O’Brien

English Muffins

I remember… at camp
when we went on walks around the loop or
we went on our amazing sail boat.
You used to make my favorite breakfast,
english muffins with butter and peanut butter.
Nobody in the world makes it better than you did.
You put love into everything you did,
especially the fire station chef.
Don’t forget I will always have a special place
in my heart for you.
I miss you!

~Darby Rutledge

Temendous black hour,
Blows behind you,
Over the woods Robing morning.
Fear was once inside me,
But now, im just numb.
I was losing you.
Your skin was so bright,
Your green eyes dancing lively.
What went wrong, how could you be gone?
Swinging on wood and rope,
Looking into the dark forest,
I remember you.
I remember,"Us".
Shutting down, shoulders slump, and once again i become lifeless.
Slipping away...
Memorizing your lopsided grin,
The way your eyes shone when you laughed,
Your warm hand slipped in to fit mine.
Forever with me...
The ivy strapped to your arms,
Your clammy skin,
The bruises,
Short breathes...

"Ana?"

My body freezes.
"Ann, hun, im here."
His voice rings inside my head.
I smile, twisiting my head looking for you, but i cant see you.
"Kyle?!"
I look around me.
"Where are you?"
His voice travels to the woods.
"Anna-Bo-Bannna!"
He sang out to me.
(whispering)
Kyle, Kyle, Kyle.

Fear escapes me.
Bees sting my heart,

This is a revised edition of The Wise One, which is just the first part. Not sure if this is better than before, I feel like it's worse, I don't know. I just decided to try something new. Honest feedback would be greatly appreciated!

i.
This Desk
"Julie loves Alex"
is wise
"This class blows"
has seen all
"first kiss!"
learned all
"merci=thanks"
felt all
"no."
and lived
"1976"
but now?
"1998"
it's here
"1989"
next to the remains of
"2000"
school lunches
"1992"
recycling bins
"2003"
with nothing left inside
"2008"
but wisdom

ii.
what is wisdom?
"John Kelly, '94-'95"
is it experiance?
"Sarah Hudson, '08"
does it come with wear?
"issued by force"
or age?
"returned with pleasure"
or hard learned lessons?

iii.
Lessons?
"Hannah is a slut!"
are harsh
"Joe has mono"
can suck
"call Kelly for a good time"
are completely unfair
"top ten hottest guys"
are untrue
"please pray for Ms. Giltham"
are hard learned

iv.
wisdom

This Desk
"Julie loves Alex"
is wise
"This class blows"
has seen all
"first kiss!"
learned all
"merci=thanks"
felt all
"no."
and lived
"1976"
but now?
"1998"
it's here
"1989"
next to the remains of
"2000"
school lunches
"1992"
recycling bins
"2003"
with nothing left inside
"2008"
but wisdom

I want to remember
But somehow I forget
All memories of moments so beloved
Thoughts of a time I wish I could visit
Thoughts of a time I wish I could relive
Staying forever, never forgetting
A time in my life when all I knew was love
There was no hate surrounding me
None given, none received

I want to remember
When my life was as easy as saying goodbye
But who am I to judge how hard saying goodbye can be
It can be easy, but it can also be harder than anything imaginable
An agreement to forget someone and likewise be forgotten
Sometimes I can feel the hot tears running down my cheek
As my hand keeps waving even though I know they’re not looking back
And that they’ll never come back
Like the memories I lost when I carelessly set them aside
I can no longer call them mine
They are wisps of smoke, drifting farther apart as I scramble to collect them

I want to remember
But why should I waste so much time
Trying to find something that cannot be found

I examine my camera
I've only had it
For half a year

Kodak EasyShare M853

"8.2 mega pixels"
Proudly gleams
In the lower
Left-hand corner

There's nothing too special
About the camera itself
It's what it's been used for
That captivates me

I've shot pictures of:

A snow fall
That will never fall
Exactly the same
Ever again

My cousin's
Second birthday
Where he sang himself
Happy Birthday
Before snorting out
The candles

Christmas with
My best friend
With my mom and dad
The first Christmas dinner
I cooked myself

Random adventures
With unmistakenly_alive12
My best friend
Where we stay up late
Worrying about sounds
In her house
Writing poetry
Gaffawing about idiots
Contemplating the meaning of life

Normal stuff

I've shot pictures of:

'Tis now...
Silence.
No more memories to share.
Got no more new emails
Or days to bear.
I've waited
Days
Days
Days on end.
Up to now.
I should be okay, right?
I should be, "Oh it's okay. You don't exist. Never Never!"
But, I'm lying to myself, aren't I?
A little more than the usual.
Blast from the past? Hahah, I'm game.
It hit me fast, fast as a slap in the face.
Stinging, ringing, twitching, HARD.
I thought I was over it, really!
I thought you were done, seriously!
Stopped, did the blooming concern
Stopped, did the yearning burn.
Now now, I'm just a little girl.
Went and typed and typed to her heart's content.
Only to find, what it really meant.
Found him, the shining star.
He said he would come soon.
When the sun came low and laughter was sparse.
Three silly boys, came to meet a dream's end.
One's off to forever matrimony
Another's off twiddling his thumbs
And the last, saunters aimlessly to nowhere.
Myself, I...
Try my best to hide the reminiscence of
"The three young men and forever lost."

My mom's memories of her are
lively
and
colorful
They taste of maple syrup
and smell like ginger cookies
They dance across her mind and vibrate
They are warm hugs and humorous anecdotes

My memories are
cold
and
clinical
The smell of old
and they taste the acrid taste of fear
they are dead
they stare at me blankly
and I don't know what to do with them
I want to hold them tight
but, like butterflies
I'm afraid of breaking their wings

I remember sitting
on the bus
in 7th grade
When I first took
your hand in mine
and started something
wonderful.

I remember when we
first kissed
it was amazing.

I remember holding you
close to me
and never wanting to
let you go
saying
"I love you"
and promising
never to stop.

I remember making out with you
in a crowded movie theater
and made our friends uncomfortable

The writer sat at his desk, thinking thoroughly about his life

and especially about his childhood

He took out the old diary he had kept since child hood

and opened it up

All of a sudden, he was gone from the chair

and didn't know where he was

He couldn't see his body, only a landscape around him

All of a sudden, a young version of himself ran past him

My memories of you are few
But they're all still
So precious to me
All those times
We were all together
In front of that
Shabby, run down house
But it didn't matter
We always had fun
I remember
Not understanding why
Everyone was so sad
On that day
They told me
That you had died
My aunt was dead
I don't remember the funeral
Or anything else
That involved your death

The girl lies in the glittering bed-like snow, moving her arms and legs to the rhythm of the angels' wings. The snow forms to the sound, and she stands up and steps away to admire her work. As she wanders back into the house, she hears the phone ringing in a distant part of the house, the refrigerator mumbling and gurgling, the dryer sucking away the moisture from newly laundered clothes.

Photos
Fallen
From the fingertips
Of the past
That sift between
The cracks in your fingers
And brush across
Your hand.
Smooth
Simple
Smiles.
Fake and real
And in between,
Shadows cast against the wall
And lighting
Orange
And whites.
You see them,
Remember
And then
It falls
Back into place
And is just a blur
Once more.

Do You Remember?

By Sarah Levine
The Grammar School, Grade 8

I am small
and you are big
and powerful
but bigger isn't always
better
some man with knowing blue eyes
taught me that
I miss the grass
whispering sweet nothings in the warm August wind
calling out
to insects, couples, and human feet
back then we were equal
I never thought of you
as something that I had to
form to
only as someone
who was to be loved
there are so many
so many
but I will find my way
through this labyrinth of loss
and come out on the other side
glowing.

His presence lingers here.
He's not ready to let go.
I ask him why
He doesn't want to rest in peace?
He simply says
He misses me.
What used to be
Just drifts away,
But comes back at night
To remind me of
All the wrong I've done.
He's the only one
Who knows the past that daunts me.
He's the soul
That wants nothing more than to haunt me.
He's the ghost
That just won't leave.

Shelf Life

By Myrrhanda Wentworth
Oxbow High School,Grade 10

Old
Used
Maybe even abused
Holding all of an old lady's keepsakes and well kept secrets

Photos
Lockets
Diaries
A patchwork blanket
An old set of keys
What sentimental things

Letters from someone she once allowed herself to love
Supressed feelings
Can't stay away for long
She remembers his big doe eyes